Its taken me a little while to recover from the performance of Miley Cyrus at the VMAs. I was pondering what I was feeling and what I wanted to write about my reaction. I’ve seen a lot of the post-performance shock and ridicule from the news and individuals -and rightfully so. My first reaction was shock then it quickly turned to anger. I was really, really upset by what I saw on my TV screen That wasn’t dancing, it wasn’t even singing in my opinion. It was a vulgar scene of a young women who looked as though she was mad at the world and was out to prove that she wasn’t “good” anymore – she had crossed over to the bad side, the dark side. She didn’t slowly creep down there, she jumped off the high dive and landed into that pool of bad head first during that performance.
Being a proponent of modesty and speaking with girls about their self image I guess I took this display of vulgarity very personally. This is what I (we) are fighting against! How can we expect the girls of this generation to think about themselves with respect and honor when their “role models” are continually objectifying themselves and sexualizing everything that they do and say? It is so frustrating and seems like a losing battle…but I have faith that there is a contingency of strong, young women out there who are fighting this tsunami wave of sexualization that is pervading this country. I hope and pray that they see past the glitter and apparent glamour that these stars seemingly live with and dig a little deeper. Have these young starlets traded in their pride, their honor for money and temporary fame? As much as some of these ladies ( I use that term very loosely) get on their soapboxes and say that they’re not role models they need to return to reality and realize that…hello??? Yes they are! Whether they want to label themselves as one or not! Somewhere right now there are some little girls wearing Hannah Montana nightgowns singing their hearts out into a karaoke machine. Why? Because they want to be Miley Cyrus. Wake up, Miley…and while your at it wake up some of your buddies.
Ok so after my anger rant was complete my feelings then changed again – now I feel pity. I pity Miley because I think she really does know right from wrong but the lure and pressure of the media and the Hollywood lifestyle is just too strong of an influence. I really hope that this is not the end to her story. I hope that the night at the VMAs is not what she will forever be known for…I hope she turns it around, wakes up and realizes what’s at stake. Unfortunately, at present time she has been sucked into the media’s web, buckled to the draw of money and fame and in return she has lost her dignity and self-respect. Was it really worth it?
Only Miley can answer that.
- Tagged dignity, honor, miley, miley cyrus, modesty, modesty is back, objectification, respect, self-esteem, self-worth, sexualization, vma's
As I comb through the latest issue of one of my favorite magazines I sigh as I see all these perfect females with perfect hair, perfect smiles, perfects arms, perfect legs – heck, all-together perfect bodies staring back at me. And then it happens – I look in the mirror and think to myself, “Geez, I have GOT to get to the gym” or “what is the deal with my hair?” or “why was I born with these legs?” All of my body image issues seem to flare up and flood my brain all at once. And then the more rational, logical side of my brain kicks it into high gear and asks, “why in the world am I measuring MY body up against THEIR bodies?” Is there a contest I didn’t know about? Do I win something if my body is better than “hers”? Nope. However, there is some sort of physical hierarchy game that I think a lot of females play, knowingly or unknowingly. They rank themselves with other women by thinking, “well, I look better than Jen…but Holly’s hair is SO much better than mine!” Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we obsess over our bodies? I think these fashion/style magazines could be having a negative effect on our self-image. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE to look at all the new trends that are coming out – love to get inspired by an outfit someone is wearing on one of the pages; but I have vowed to try to view these images for what they are – IMAGES, better yet, most are PHOTO-SHOPPED images! How can we measure up to perfection? Answer: We can’t. All I can do is be the best ME…all you can do is be the best YOU. So stop obsessing! You are beautiful just as you are!
I came across this article that reinforces these ideas…what do you think? Am I reading into this issue too much? Would love to hear your thoughts!
A passage from the book of Psalms that I always find inspirational:
Oh yes, You shaped me first inside, then out;
You formed me in my mother’s womb.
I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
You know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, You watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I’d even lived one day.
She described me as ‘puffy’, which isn’t exactly what I’d use in any sort of bio. Can you imagine: Hi! I’m Steph. I like coffee, reading, and spending time with friends. I’m outgoing, spontaneous, and puffy. Puffy. It certainly doesn’t have an alluring, feminine ring.
Yet, I was puffy. I was overweight, out of shape, and discontent. My friend’s observation, though a bit hurtful, illuminated the condition of my heart. While my heart didn’t resemble a frosted cinnamon roll, it was full of insecurities. Those insecurities crept into every aspect of life. Every interaction, every prayer, every movement was shrouded with a big, puffy blanket. A security blanket that I thought would protect me, but in reality it just kept me from being real. I was hiding behind the Pillsbury Doughboy.
Since that day, almost 6 years ago, I’ve done a lot to fix the outside, but more than that, I’ve worked on having a healed heart. No longer do feel compelled to fish for compliments, to seek affirmation, to hide myself. I’m certainly a lot less puffy, but I’m also happy to be me. Of course, I’m far from perfect, but now, even in the midst of my flaws I’ve hung up the blankie and just let people see the real me. As I continue to work on becoming ‘my best’, I’ve learned that God loves me unconditionally, and despite my humanity He’s created me for a unique purpose. The same is true for you! Why, then, do we hide behind masks (or in my case, a fictional, very doughy character)?
MODgrl would LOVE to hear from you either in the comments, or privately at firstname.lastname@example.org.
And remember, Truth says, “All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you.” Song of Solomon 4:7